India - My Life within and without

So Diwali is gone...I did celebrated, I made my own rules and my own ways to celebrate diwali in this unknown country of mine. I was going thru some issues of life so I could not go to Little India to buy what I wanted to buy for Dhanteras and Diwali so I went to stores close by and bought some of the things which somewhere satisfy the route of happiness and satisfaction for me during this festival season...Indian festival season.

We use to buy diyas(clay lanterns) two days prior Dhanteras and soak them in water so it absorbs most of the water and it don't soak extra oil or ghee. After a day we use to keep then on clean towel or paper in sun so thye are fully dry and we can lit them well. Next and third day which is Dhanteras...we use to put mustard oil in some of the diyas and let it stand for few minutes and then after the puja, we used those diyas to decorate the house...and this process goes until bahidooj OR bhaibeej which is 5th day from Dhanteras...all these edays have different names...Dhanteras, Choti Diwali, Diwali, Vishkarma day and then Bhai dooj...as I have mentioned earlier too that we then give sweets to friends and family and our loved ones and then fireworks, the bigger the gifts and fire works the most biggest rich you are in town...

Anyways that was a traditional way of celebrating with modern style...am in a country where Diwali has no meaning even for some Indians and I am not surprised cos this coutry is based on different religion and different rules of life. I celebrated this diwali with fun rule...I bought tons of candies, chocolates & small size candles. I did puja (prayer) at fixed time and this time I was all alone to finish it so I grabbed my own arm and started puja by lighting brass diya and some candles. I put some chocolates in My Mandir, I have made at home and some coins as we do Lakshmi Puja (goddess of Money) I turned some aartis (religious songs) on my laptop and tried to sing in my broken voice with it...it was all done in 10 minutes and then I took some candies, chocolates and some candles and went to see my neighbors..they were more than happy to light a candle outside their apartments and accept chocolates from me...I lit some candles in front of every body's place and many more in row in front of my place...I came back and I was back to my table and back to laptop and internet...Diwali was fun and it was none...still positive side...I was able to celebrate diwali...I wasn't disabled or sick to be part of this.

Ok, I was sad...I am still a bit but I am trying to cheer up. I have no one to share my moments with, no one to speak to...so it becomes more harder to cheer up, but its not impossible.